The Color of Dry...

I got the BEST tip today from Denise. I just love these little things that make sense and make big family life better.er

Colored towels. Each member of the family gets their own color. So then, you know which culprit left the towel on the floor, rather than all of them in unison saying "Its not mine!"... and they are responsible for getting them in and out of the laundry, etc.

So simple, so fun and so colorful! Thanks Denise! {http://faithinactionfamily.blogspot.com/} I'm going towle shopping!

Have you ever said...?

I wish I had her calling?

Ok, I know I REALLY don't. I love the life God has given me. My boundaries fall in pleasant places.

But I just love this blog. :) You HAVE to go look at the blog of this precious missionary family in Indonesia. They are so precious and beautiful and I can't even imagine what this is like!

Wow!

http://sahmissionary.blogspot.com/

Random

Random picture, Random thoughts.....

Isn't that the sweetest picture? That is my Nicholas, who is now 10. Kiss those chubby cheeks. Still such a love.

So Randomness:

It's Friday! Yea!

Chaperoned a 5th grade field trip to see a play of Swiss Family Robinson, learned to talk pirate. "ARGH!Argh, arghy, arghedy, argh!" Lots of fun.

Pizza, popcorn, Movies with dear kiddos and dear friend Rebecca and her son. Lots of good girl talk upstairs while kiddos watched downstairs.

Ghosttown...funny movie...odd movie, yet funny movie. Actually laughed out loud.

Saturday coming, sleeping in, no "have to dos", which is pretty cool!

House quiet, all asleep. Heart content.

Esther study is really good! Week 7.

Loving my God, loving my kids.

So that is my Friday Randomness...

Love you momma! you too daddy!

A New Discovery

I have made a new discovery, which I am calling "Taste Bud Heaven".

Double the carbs, double the taste.

Being at my desk, and wierd, in need of snack, I put a salty Ritz cracker on top of a sweet Graham Cracker...and...

Voila!...Like the little mouse in Ratatoulle.. a new taste sensation!

Try it.

{for any real life, go check out my adoption blog...that is where real life is today}

In need of:

Today...when I got to work...or actually on the drive in.... I realized what I felt like I truly needed.

I was in need of a good cry and a good nap...and I have time for neither.

Nothing specifically wrong or troubling. Just tired, and moving too fast and in need of a halt. Emotions are right under the surface and circles under my eyes.

But, I have things to do, meetings to prepare for, presentations to complete and motivation to find. After a cup of Starbucks, I am doing better, but oh for a few hours of nothing.

Time to Settle....

I was thinking about how on one end of the spectrum is being too spontaneous and being tossed by every wind and wave, and not thinking things through. Or just being impatient and running with something.

On the other end is being immovable, stubborn or disobedient.

I am finding, what works best, is to give things time to settle. Every inspiration or epiphany is not an immediate call to action. Especially those late night enlightenments. (Home Shopping Channel for example. :))

Seriously, I can often think an idea, or inspiration or word means I should immediately go out and do such and such, to find out, after a little time goes by, maybe even just a few hours, or maybe a day or week, that the enlightenment was good, maybe even right, but the interpretation of what I think I MUST immediately go do, is off. I need to give it time to seep into my soul and spirit. To slow down and let God work the word and thought into me.

Sometimes, maybe, I do not have an action to go "do" until further down the line. Too often I am either having to go back and undo something I jumped into, or worse yet, live through the stress I have caused for myself by over-committing.

There is just so much I end up thinking I "SHOULD" do. Good things. Needful things. But, when the tea settles at the bottom of the cup, I find, not the BEST thing.

I have a core purpose in my life and I need to measure all this against that core purpose. It is so hard, when the items are good, biblical, needed. But there is only so much one woman can do and I would rather do my core purpose well, then to let it just get by, as I cover so many other bases as well.

And I have to stop the comparison game. Whether it is comparing against some actual person I see from the outside, but really do not know what is behind the scenes, or this imaginary standard of what could (should) be done.

My purpose is to love and serve God with the "ministry" He has given me, which is my family. That means working to provide for them, running a home that is a safe and happy haven, and nurturing my children's body, soul and spirit and being a loving daughter to my parents. That is the core. All else is extra-curricular activities.

An example: I really felt, after four years of leading a women's Bible Study at church, I needed to take a break to focus on my kids, Mary, with some challenges she is having, and Olivia Mame, soon to join our family from Ethiopia. I just needed to pull back from focusing on leading and let someone else step into that role. I would never stop Bible Study, I live on it. But to stop leading it. So I contacted the leader of our Women's Ministry and she graciously understood and is in the process of looking at who will lead it and what study. I felt relieved.

Then...

Two things happened. First, I was looking at our church website for some information and noticed that on the Women's Tuesday night Bible Study I was listed at the leader. I know this sounds dumb, but I never considered myself as the leader. I mean, I led, this one study, and then that one study, and then, this other one, until it turned into four years, with a little break once or twice, but never did I consider myself THE leader. So I thought, wow! If I had known I was the leader, it would have been more of a big deal to step down. And I wondered was I letting them down?

Then, this morning in my devotions, was the verse in Phil 2:4 about "Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others". And it started me thinking about community and how we all are looking and longing for community. Whether it is a hobby group, family, work teams, Internet groups, neighborhoods, causes or church. That our world has gotten so big, so impersonal...and everyone can be so isolated...that we are all looking to our own interests. If we do connect, it is based on those "own interests" and never very permanent.

Then I thought about church and connections and various times in my life when I felt I really belonged. A youth group in high school, a bunch of friends in my 20's, a small group at a large church I use to attend. Then I thought: Is this women's bible study my connection point? Is it my small group. and am I walking away from it? Letting myself detach. By then end of all my journaling, I had convinced myself that I was wrong in stepping down and I needed to go fix it QUICK. Even if it was going to be hard on my family...

Fastfoward a few hours, letting it all settle. And I see my panic, to go reverse my decision, was one of those reactions to immediately DO SOMETHING, without thinking it through. My core purpose, God and my family, is currently in need of more momma time. So, my looking after the interests of others, for this season, needs to be the others in my family.

I am so glad I let it settle a bit, before I typed that email..... Sometimes the quickness of technology is not necessarily a blessing, but more of a temptation to mess.

Let it settle a bit.

A Great Recipe...

No not for cupcakes....but for life. :) A friend sent this to me today and it has some good food for thought:

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.

2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Talk to God about what is going on in your life. Buy a lock if you have to.

3. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to__________ today. I am thankful for______________'.

4. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.

5. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli , almonds & walnuts.

6. Try to make at least three people smile each day.

7. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.

9. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

10. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

11. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

12. You are not so important that you have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

13. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

14. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

15. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

16. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'

17. Forgive everyone for everything.

18. What other people think of you is none of your business.

19. GOD heals everything - but you have to ask Him.

20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

21. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch!!!

22. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

23. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements:
I am thankful for__________. Today I accomplished_________.

24. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.

25. When you are feeling down, start listing your many blessings. You'll be smiling before you know it.

Cupcakes, Basketball, Hints of Spring and Gameboys: A Full Weekend

We had a very fun and full weekend.

I made "snow" cupcakes for scrapbook night. It was fun and they turned out so cute!

Nick had an awesome basketball game! Very close and they came from behind to win it with the fans going wild! He has one more game. We have so loved his playing this season, just a taste of years to come.

Driving through Starbucks, I saw a hint of spring and had to snap a picture of the pink blossoms. Nick calls it pink popcorn.."Popcorn popping on the apricot tree."

I surprized the boys, by buying two used Gameboy Advanced. They had done so well with the old, almost broken one a friend had given them. I have not seen two more excited little men! And I have quickly discovered it is a great motivation tool. Whether more play time as a positive consequence or loss of playtime as a negative one, ...I have had very cooperative boys this weekend. That is just a peek into our weekend....and now we are ready for another work/school week. Perhaps a really special one, Olivia Mame's court date is Thursday, so who knows what this week will bring!

A sweet giveaway from "My Place of Peace

Isn't this the cutest. The photo is Shilo's and the giveaway too. Check out her blog and get a chance for these cuties. Here: http://myplaceofpeace.blogspot.com/2009/02/giveaway.html

You have until Monday 23rd.

Thankful Thursday...

Is it Thursday already!? So what am I thankful for?

• A room full of giggles from down the hall, as they are all playing, shouting yarn yarn, as they wrap a ball of my yarn around each other.


• Taddy, doing a one man act, re-enacting his field trip to the play "Are you my mommy".


• Sunshine today


• Hope in the eyes and heart of my dear friend Rebecca


• A new pink shirt.


• Two families passing court today, after multiple failures, to make their Ethiopian children theirs! Yea Grace and Tammie!


• My job, my health, my warm big house, with enough room for all our noise.


• Chinese food, which it seems is becoming more and more of a tradition on Thursday.


• No tv. :) (We limit movies to weekends, although I do give in on some Thursday nights.) Tonight I did not give in, and they are playing and giggling. ....and of course making a mess.


• Fridays..right around the corner.


• Bed time. At 1 oclock I was STILL not asleep last night, and bedtime is looking so attractive tonight.


• The word. God is bringing me back alive, back to hope, back to joy, through his word.

Just a small piece of what I am thankful for.

A poem I wrote tonight...for my friend Stephanie

{Just being silly}

The dog went bark
The cat went meow
The pa went darn, oh how how how
Am I ever gonna get my chores all done
With dogs and cats, go get my gun.

The dog went arf
The cat went hiss
The momma said HUN, now listen to this
Ya ain’t gonna shoot my cat or dog
Or ya gonna be sleepin out back with the hog

The dog went sigh
The cat when purr
The pa grumbled off, geesh listen to her
Ya’d think she thought that she was the boss
I’m gonna go off and ride my hoss

The momma she sat
The dog at her feet
The door all locked, the cat purred sweet
Momma read her book and sipped her tea
And giggled, as she saw pa forgot his key.

Saddle Up. Sufficiently Courageous...

“Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway” - John Wayne

"I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed but will have sufficient courage so that now, as always, Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death." -Philippians 1:20

{This was my verse that I focused on this morning, on my "first" new day of getting up early with God. }

Sufficient courage. Sufficient, enough, just enough. Not super brave, over-the-top heroic-, but enough courage to make it-..being afraid, yet saddling up anyway, as John Wayne says.

The circumstances in our life can be a real temptation to abandon the role of service to our Lord in our situation. That "small thing" that he has called us to do can feel so hard, so "big" in the living out of it moment by moment.

Through prayer, the word, God's Spirit in us-- by faith we believe hope, expect that we will have sufficient courage - enough - to do it well, to exalt Christ in what we do- in our body, the exalted, enthroned, victorious, sufficiently courageous Christ dwells IN US by His Spirit and is at work in us.

IT is not all up to us, no boot-strap pulling only, to muster up the bravery, nobility, to do the right thing. Yes, like Esther, we are called for such a time as this to do our part, like Samuel, to say, "Yes Lord, your servant is listening", like Mary, "Be it with me as you have spoken."

We have our part. But the truly hard, courageous part comes from Christ's Spirit dwelling and working in us. The same Spirit that had sufficient courage to endure the cross, far beyond our daily burden/cross...

We are {if yielded, our part} controlled by that Spirit, the Spirit of God lives in us and that Spirit gives life {and power and courage}. Rom 8:9-10

We were bought at a high price, our courageous Christ's very life. We honor God with our body (I Cor 6:20) when we choose to live to exalt Him. A little courage on our part is met with more than enough power and life on His part.

"Yes, I will continue to rejoice, for I know that through prayers and the help given by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened {is happening, will happen} to me will turn out for my {and others} deliverance. I eagerly expect and hope {faith}that I will have sufficient courage so that now {this moment, this season, this day} as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death." Philippians 1:18b-20.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Personalized Psalms 121
I lift up my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord! The maker of heaven and earth!
He will not let my foot slip-
He who watches over me will not slumber, indeed, He who watches over Israel will never slumber or sleep.
The Lord watches over me.
The Lord is my shade {umbrella} at my right hand.
The sun {or storm} will not harm me {or mine} by day or by night.
The Lord will keep me from all harm.
He will watch over my life {and the life of mine}.
The Lord will watch over my coming and going, both now and forever more! Amen.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Saddled up!

Glug glug glug!

From yesterday's quote of encouragement: "God is like a big glass of milk, he will cover that taste if you drink deeply of him."

A new season is here! I have finished Gilmore Girls (yes, Lorelie and Luke ended up together, and yes I know, they are FICTIONAL and there really is NOT a Stars Hallow!) so that is behind me and I am glad to say:

I DID IT!

I got up this morning, early, before kids and work, and spent time with God, in Phillipians and Psalms. My children reaped the benefit of a happy momma this morning!

Thank you God! And thank you ladies of encouragement on MMM (Motivate me Monday!) Hurrah!

It tastes good!

Birdie Giveaway

Cute little birdie....Give-away. Win a bundle of cards...check it out here: http://apieceofpunkinpie.blogspot.com/2009/02/little-birdie-told-me.html

She has a shop on ETSY too, very cute.

Motivate Me Monday..Really?

A big update PS.

We did go grocery shopping, tacos for dinner, no cupcakes, but four games of Chinese checkers later. I still felt so yucky, though, that I decided to go read ALL the other Motivate Me Monday posts, from the blog collection below. Here is what spoke to me:

1. I NEED, MUST be obedient to getting up and spending time with God FIRST, in the word and prayer DAILY! I must I must I must. I know what to do and don't do it. That is the ONLY thing that will get me out of this funk.
2. My loneliness or any soul discomfort, should cause me to run to God and His word, not the internet, or blogs or Gilmore Girl episodes or even scrapbook hobbies.
3. That "God never told us that following Him would be easy." SO TRUE. So I need to quit expecting it to be and acting confused, dismayed or depressed when it is not.
4. Following God is "always been easier ...than leading." If I will let it, it can take the worry and stress out. If I let it. (sidenote: hmmm, something just hit me, even my worry over my "state of mind/soul" and my funk....I can let go. I can quit worrying about it and just pray about it and trust. hmmmm.)
5. "Don't forget to take time to breath in the midst of your chaos and listen carefully for God's whisper". YES! I forget too often. Even now, if I hush the keyboard..I can hear it. {Those last three gems came from here: http://baldwinedge6.blogspot.com/2009/02/monday-inspiration.html , worth the read.}
6. A NEON reminder of " what being a mom is all about"... ya know, being there for the not-so-fun stuff... which consequently makes the fun stuff even more meaningful." Is that not so true. How do I forget or check out of that????!!! THIS is what being a mom is about. The sermon this Sunday at Lakeside was about doing the small things for God. This is my BIG small thing. Being the mom God wants me to be! (And how can I be that without being fully connected with God and getting filled every morning. IT keeps coming back to that! My number one need.)
7. A reminder of how much playing worship, godly music for me and the kids is a tone setter. (Today we were listening to the Reggae for Kids. And although it was cute and upbeat, some of the lyrics were objectional. Good reminder.)
8. "I will walk in my house with a blameless heart." Psalm 101:2 This verse just popped out in 3-D to me. I am SO FAR from this. I am starting to memorize verses with my mom and hopefully a couple girlfriends, and THIS is my second half of February verse!
9. "My job and goal should be to create a place of peace, this can only be found by surrendering my thoughts on home [and family] to God's thoughts on home [and family]."
10. "I need to dig deep and find some motivation!" I know this. I even alluded to it in my post, but I stopped short. I got up and went shopping when what I needed to do was ".encourage myself in the Lord." As one blogger shared, praising God takes our eyes off ourself, or our circumstance or our mood and onto God. But sometimes I just don't feel like praising, don't have anything to say that would be authentic. She then suggested a wonderful wat to get our "hearts and minds back on track is to read the Psalms and pray those beautiful words back to Him." I know this is true. I know this works! so NIKE!
11. Someone said it so well, just like Paul, in that "Have you ever noticed how hard it is to do the right thing?" And how as a parent we are presented with this challenge "every single day". (Many times a day!)
12. Teaching our children that their relationship with God is far more important than anything, no matter how alluring or seemingly important. Me too, teach me too!
13. And I think perhaps the BEST advice and insight out of the whole group:
    If [something has left a} bitter taste in your mouth, know that God is like a big glass of milk, he will cover that taste if you drink deeply of him."

Amen! After reading all these blogs and gleaning their inspiration, I feel ashamed of mine. Perhaps next time, I will share something more life-giving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OK, so I read a blog post about trying to motivate on Mondays with the suggestion to "Share some advice, wisdom, practical applications, tips you've learned, etc. that you think would benefit and motivate others."

So here is the challenge, it is Monday, raining/cold, "holiday" with all of us off work and school and I am on a string of too many days being unmotivated about ANYTHING (other than watching Gilmore Girls, and I just finished the last episode of the last season, last night.)

I have been having a hard time, internally, for longer than I can remember. Barely bobbing as I tred water, I pop of from drowning in self-disgust or self-absorption, just to find myself back again by the next day, if not sooner. Sad. (Are you motivated yet?)

I don't want to do anything and I don't want to do nothing.

I feel like I have just checked out of life, yet life and dinner, and dishes and laundry, and leading Bible study and work, and kids needing me...still goes on. My body is there, barely, my mind, occiasionally, my heart seems to bounce between, dead, grumpy, hurt and nothing....grey. Moody? Depressed?

Who knows.

And now to motivate. lol (ok, col)

In Beth's Esther study, one thing she said hit me. She talked about how anger can burn or maybe it was fear, I forget which emotion she was talking about, but that the source of the fear (or anger) was not this other person, but our THOUGHTS about it.

My funk, what ever it is, I could try to keep analyzing it, keep trying to get over it, keep thinking it through and planning a new way of escape, but those are all THOUGHTS. Not real. Rather than giving it so much mental press, perhaps I will quit thinking about it. Just let it go. Get up, go grocery shopping, fix a yummy dinner, maybe even throw in some cupcake baking and move on.

You know, I think I will.

Well, at least I motivated me.

A Valetine PS. To the one I love.

Taddy just walked into my bedroom with his arms full of "Valentine" stuffed animals, saying Look at this momma!! I love that my little boy still loves stuffed animals. When we got home from Nicholas' basketball game, Angela had candy, cards and stuffed animals on the table for each of us! :)

I have given each us stuffed animals, cards and candy this morning..so double blessings.

I was so proud of Nick at his game. He is becoming quite the player, putting some points on the scoreboard and playing with character and stamina.

Later this night, we went to see Jordan, my friend Donna's son play basketball, highschool style. When we got home, Lori, my prayer cup partner at church, had left us a bag of candy's, glow bracelets and valentine cards.

Blessings and love all day long.

On her blog today,http://livingproofministries.blogspot.com/2009/02/oh-that-bewitching-day.html Beth said, among other things:

"[We] have an eternity-long Valentine who reigns in the Heavens. He is breathtakingly handsome and will spend more on a date than any man alive. .... I pray this day that you will thoroughly savor your Valentine, ... veiled from sight in such gleaming perfections that you couldn't live through a glance of Him if He showed up at your table. You are your Beloved's and His desire is toward you. Song of Songs 7:10. If you don't have a romantic interest in your life this year, let Jesus woo you today.

Read what He's like in Psalm 45.
Take a long walk with him.
Or go get yourself some flowers from Him. I dare you to. That's His money in your pocket.
Journal a long time to Him and tell Him your hopes and dreams.

He's more vividly real than anything you can touch with your fingertips or see with your eyes, Beloved One.Jesus, woo her this day. Make her feel so tended to that she wonders how anyone else on earth could sense you today."

Then my dear sweet friend Rebecca sent this "valentine" to us. A song by Hillsong, This is our God.

SO I say, This is my Valentine, to the one I love:

Words & Music by Reuben Morgan

Your grace is enough
More than I need
At Your word I will believe
I wait for You
Draw near again
Let Your Spirit make me new

CHORUS:
I will fall at Your feet
I will fall at Your feet
And I will worship You here

Your presence in me
Jesus light the way
By the power of Your word
I am restoredI am redeemed
By Your Spirit I am free

Freely You gave it all for us
Surrendered Your life upon that cross
Great is the love Poured out for all
This is our God
Lifted on high from death to life
Forever our God is glorified
Servant and King
Rescued the world
This is our God

© 2008 Reuben Morgan / Hillsong Publishing

Happy Heart Day!

What do I love

It is valentines day, so of course I have to think of the things” I love. Love, that ambiguous word that can wiggle all over the place from silly to deep. And so here is my wiggly love list:

Naps
quilts
Quilts and naps together
Seasons
Crackling fireplaces on rainy nights
A good book or twelve (always reading many)
The naughtiness of reading a novel. I have so many “other” books, novel reading makes me feel guilty
A latte
A chatty email from mom, Rebecca, or stephanie
Knitting
My sons basketball games
Taddy happy over remember his bible memory verse.
Mary smiling and so happy as we ice heart cookies
Angela laughing
Bella, in her playful stance as she leaps in the air paws going with giddiness
Quiet
Children’s snores
Boys reading in their beds at night and so excited to tell me their stories
Christian children’s authors
Beth Moore
Digital scrapbooking
When mom and I crack each other up, we haven’t laughed much lately, let’s do it.
Papa’s face when he has made something cool and gives it to us
When my brother calls me out of the blue
Hugs, real ones
The sweetness of God’s presence when my heart is desperate for him
God’s word coming alive and into the moment
Victory Christian School
The sweet spirit of Mrs. Burger, Mary’s kg teacher.
How much Saxton likes Mary and by association, me! Always greets us with real enthusiasm. Can’t fake that!
Pink
Brown
A dinner that everyone loves and gobbles up
My three precious children.
The thought of Olivia Mame
A surprise
Little thoughtfulness’s from my momma, the Sunday funnies, a magazine article, a little treat.
Prayers for me and my children.
The gift to pray for others rather than feeling hopeless to help.
The knowledge that my shepherd is shepherding and it is not all up to me.
Bible Study
Playing games with the kids and everyone is into it
Colorful socks
Smooshy pillows
Sunshine after the rain
Rain after too many days of sunshine
Fog
The smell and sound and air of the ocean
Sea shells

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy Valentines Day. Eat Chocolate!

I {heart} Papa

Today is my dad's birthday!

Happy Birthday Papa!

He is 76 years old today, I think, or is it 75? :( My bad.

Both he and mom are sick right now, if you could pray for them.

This is a scrapbook page I made today for him.

It reads:

Papa to my kids,

Dad to me now,

Daddy when I was younger.

When I think of you,

there,

loving,

constant my whole life long,

I think of the word

loyal.
And commited.

Committed to mom,

to me and my brother,

to God,

to doing what is right.

Loyalty and commitment

are synonymns of

Love

Papa, you are love to us!

Happy Birthday!

We love YOU!

What a find!!!!

We just love Jan Brett's books! We have the Mitten, the Hat, On Noah's Ark, Gingerbread Baby, The Three Snow Bears....

The list goes on and on (see here: http://janbrett.com/booklist.htm)

We love her illustrations and warm stories..and for a collector of children's books, hers are among our favorites.

Well, I just found out she has a website with tons, (like in the 1000's) of freebies. Bookmarks, activities, crafts, even flashcards...(Look out Taddy, I am printing out the subtraction ones), masks, valentines. The list is endless.

And her terms of use are that you can use them print them, reproduce them for personal, classroom or libray use! How awesome is that??!!!!!

Here is her site: http://janbrett.com/

I plan to print out some goodies as Valentine "gifts" for my kids! What a cool find!. Thanks to a dear blogger at this site: http://smallfox.typepad.com/a_small_fox_in_a_big_worl/

I discovered what 1000's of others already know! :) thanks!

A sample mask:

Flash cards

Book marks

Enjoy!

Thankful Thursday

What I am thankful for today:

Valentine cookies with pink and white icing and sprinkles, that Mary and I made last night for her school party.

The flexibility to work from home when one of my kids is sick and has to miss school, and her party.

My silly furry puppy, who like to "dig" the quilts to make a soft place to lie.

Other women who encourage me in my faith and life by sharing their own insights....like this one: http://peterspeapod.blogspot.com/2009/02/practical-teaching-testimony-part-1.html

Pink socks

Warm knitted aphgans

Rainy days...they feel so special.

My momma...I miss her today!

New eye glasses, I get them in 10 days!

Thursday nights, we are all home, no place to take this child, or that one, and it is one day away from Friday! Maybe we'll play games!

Angela, who helps out so much and makes my life easier.

Deep end of the pool...

I had this dream last night that has lingered with me all day. It has made me sad. Has made me hug my kids longer...and just feel like being a recluse.

When I woke up from it, I was yelling "Get your hands off my boy!". After I woke up and thought about the dream, I just stayed in bed and cried.

Both for the feeling of what was happening in the dream, but more for the pain my child was experiencing in the dream... and for my lack of doing something. I kept thinking, once I was awake, "I should have jumped in right away! I should have jumped in right away!"

And I thought, that is true of my life. So often, I just am slow, or preoccupied, or consciously choose to remain detached, rather than jumping into it. And my children suffer for it. Oh, I have my excuses. I am tired. Or in the other room, or waiting to see if it will work out, or they shouldn't have been doing that in the first place. .... ya da ya da ya da. But the truth is, I should jump in sooner. It is my jb to protect them. Sometimes from each other, and sometimes even from themselves. And my delay, out of self-centeredness, allows them to get hurt - perhaps just emotionally- but hurt just the same.

I prayed, Lord, help me. Give me more energy. Give me less focus on me. It is NOT all about me. Help me to jump in sooner.

Here is my dream.

We walked into a swimming pool area, others were already there, and I walked in with my three kids. A few kids were sitting on the steps of the deep end, I sat in a chair there, and my kids were over on the side, waiting. A large, middle aged man was cleaning the pool. It was odd, because he was fully dressed (striped shirt) and going into the pool and scooping out debris. Every few seconds he would sit by the side of the pool and rest, then continue. The kids on the steps were complaining, couldn't they go in the deep end, since he was finished there.

He did not answer, just continued, with a mad look on his face, with his task. Taddy, not picking up on the clue that he was not suppose to be in the pool, did a big jump into the deep end. I kind of laughed and was starting to tell him, he needed to get out, when from the corner of my eye, I could see a big blur running toward the pool on my left side. It was the pool cleaner guy, and he was furious.

He jumped in and went straight to Taddy, wrapped his elbow around Taddy's neck. He dragged him to the bottom of the pool, then came up, still with Taddy in a "rescue" hold. I could see the look on Taddy's face... fear and crying...as the man started swimming toward where a bunch of folks were gathered in the shallow end, with Taddy in tow.

Here's the part that kills me. I just watched for a minute! I watched! I did not get up! I did not say anything, I watched! Then, like I was a slug, I saw Taddy's face and I sat up (sat up, not jumped up!) I even remember thinking, I should jump in the pool, but I was LETTING IT PLAY OUT!. I finally, sat and pointed my finger at that man and screamed: "Let go of my boy! Let go of my boy! Let go og my boy!" As I was starting to get up. My yelling caused others to notice, and several other adults started running toward the man who had Taddy.

That is when I woke up...thinking, I should have jumped in right away! Why did I delay?!! What kind of mother would delay??!!!

It has hurt my heart all day. I know it was only a dream. But on some level, it just opened my eyes, on how selfish I am, on how often I put me and my wants first. How I act like I am "bothered" at times to deal with stuff.

And I am so so sorry. I want to be a good mommy. I want to be the mommy my kids deserve. I just have to jump in sooner. And put my "stuff" on the back burner, more often!

I love you Taddy.

I love you Nicholas.

I love you Mary Beth.

I want a "hiccup"... Thoughts on my mind today

Yesterday, driving home from an eye doctor appt, Mary told me:

" I want a hiccup. When I grow up, I am only going to have a couple kids so I can get a hiccup."

It took me a moment to process, that Mary has the same attraction to old pickups, that I do. My boys too! The conversation went on about how the "hiccup" could be her second car, when she is rambling around on errands, and she could still have a big family with a big family car too.

It dawned on me, as much as I love "hiccups", why didn't I buy one when I bought a second car? ...next time maybe.

So miscellenous thoughts on my mind today:

• It is said that "what is essential, is invisible to the eye". Then WHY does the reflection in the mirror bug me so much?! A co-worker came into my office this am and said, "WOW! Did you not get much sleep last night!" ha! Uh-no! It is called being a real woman of age... I keep mumbling: "What is essential, what is essential, what is essential."
• I bought three new pants this weekend, "slackish" pants. One was in a size bigger. A size I have not worn in 3 or 4 years, when I lost all my weight. nuf said!
• I think my mom does not like my red hair. Well, in fact, I know she doesn't. Besides telling me she doesn't, she leaves me articles about if you don't like the red of henna, but want to use natural dyes....etc.. I love you momma. And I know you love me, in spite of my red hair. At least it is not a tatoo or a nose ring. ha.
• Valentines day is this week. It use to bug me. Now I am just surprized it got here so quickly, and I hope I have enough Valentines I bought last year on sale after the holiday for the kids parties tomorrow. No heartsy decorations around the house this year. I was pre-occupied and it just snuck up on me. Maybe some red and white cupcakes or heart shaped cookies.
• I am feeling a weight off my shoulders. Odd to say, but with the decision to adopt Mame only, I feel less stressed and tense. Like I don't have to be wonder woman.
• Mom called God the "God whisperer". And it just really resonated with me. I had not thought of it. Like our Esther study, He is working in what appears to be just circumstances, moods, thoughts, but at times is whispering His will into us.
• Basketball has been "veddy veddy good" for Nicholas. I hate that we only have three games left. I am going to look for a basketball camp during spring break.
• I am thinking about stepping out, for a while, from leading Women's Bible Study after this one is done in five more weeks. It will be around the time to travel to Ethiopia, then help Mame transition into our family, IF we pass court on the 26th, and I just need a break. I can't live without Bible study personally, but I don't need to lead it for a while.
• I am going to pitch a fit, if Luke and Lorelei do NOT get married on Gilmore Girls. Now don't spoil it for me. I am on season 6, and it is still all up on the air. sooooo...hush!
• When I told Rebecca that I felt like I had not impacted anyone to adopt, she said the most wonderful thing. I had shared how upset Nicholas was over us not adopting Hanna, too, and Rebecca said: "perhaps the best 'impact' might be to Nick. Who knows, you might have a house full of little grandbabies from all races with him! And that..is great influence...for generations to come! What a blessing is that?!" And she is right, what a blessing is that! (Since Mary will only have a "hiccup" full).
  

Well, that is kind of my mind this am.... nothing earth shattering or profound. Let me know if you know of a good deal on an ol' hiccup!

Two Cuties...

Sorry for the fuzzy picture. These two cuties. (With their striped pjs, I said they look like two sleepy-eyed littl prisoners!) :) ..they are my niece Michelle's new little twin boys...Oden and Kenny.

Darling. Can you even imagine. She is going to get strong biceps from totting those two carriers!

I have been thinking about prayer lately. I know so many folks desperately in need of our prayers, and God's word is true, that says the fervent prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective...(avails much).

Each prayer, no matter how long, short, or simple, if from the heart, goes straight to the heart of God.

So I am praying.....

Lord, come....lead us, meet our deepest needs and even our little ones... save us, for we are yours.

Thankful Thursday

Another momma blogger I follow does Thankful Thursdays...and what a good idea that is to pause and take a moment to think about what I am thankful for. So much:

• My God, Lord, Spirit and Savior. Where would I be without you?


• God's word and how it IS truly alive and life-giving. I am reminded constantly how I need my daily dose to live. It just changes my perspective, raises my spirit, gives me hope and love and purpose and the strength to do what is set before. Yet, again and again, I skip.... why is that?


• Bible Study teachers: Specifically at the moment, Beth Moore and her Esther study. Session 4, to learn to face my fears, in itself alone, is enough to change my life.


• Nicholas, his quest for learning, and sense of humor, his intelligence and enthusiasm, passion and openness. He is loving and has a heart for God. He is my little man, being molded by God.


• Anthony: My warrior and tender-heart. Under his warrior, loving everything valient, is a tender, loving, caring spirit. SO precious. He loves God, loves to read his bible and stories about God and is delighted when He sees God's hand at work. He loves to be a helper...


• Mary Beth: My China beauty, full of spirit. So wanting to do whats right, yet fully aware of the battle within. Loving all things girlie AND all things rough and tumble, and so responsive to even an ounce of kindness.


• Olivia Mame: My daughter to be. I have heard how smart you are, how caring, a mother hen to the other little girls and boys, so resilient, and always smiling. I cannot wait to fill you up with affection and let you mother some little chicks here.


• Hanna: My other daughter-to-be...a calm and serene face, I know nothing about you. But I am grateful that I will get to know you and that you are joining our family.


• Angela: The gap you fill for me, being a single momma, and getting my kids to and from all the places they need to be, with lunches and back-packs...safe and sound. You are easy going, hardworking and helpful to all of us.


• Bella: You silly little hairy doggie, that makes us laugh, with your scampering about.


• My Parents: Who prays for us and cares for us like you? And all the little sweet things you do and bring. Keeping my Nicky supplied in "funnies" alone, is something to be grateful for! :) Your love for God and trust in Him is inspiring.


• Friends: Rebecca and Stephanie my two-confidantes. How lonely I would be without you. Kristy, Heather, Nancy, Donna...sisters in the Lord and caring hearts. I thank God for you.


• My house: Big enough for all of us and cheap enough to afford...on a safe street with parks in walking distance. Thank you Lord, a blessing to us.


• My job: Providing for my family, doing enjoyable work, and flexible to adjust to the needs of a momma with kids. My boss is awesome! Giving me the ability to adopt my daughters!


• Digital Scrapbooking! I am having a blast getting caught up on Mame's book and cannot wait to move on to the other ones. Should have started this years ago.


• Gilmore Girls: My current favorite TV to DVD show....:)

I know I have SO much more and more and more to be grateful for..but this is my top ones right now.

Ground Hogs and Daisies

So, on the drive to school this morning, we dubbed our car, "ground hog" and determined he DID see his shadow, in fact was chasing it as Taddy was telling it (the shadow) to get back into the hole because he does not want more winter! :)

It was such a nice weekend weather wise...upper 60's. We went to the doggy park, kids and Bella all rolicked with the small dogs...at one point NIck collected about 8 tennis balls and threw them all up in the air at once, hoping for a doggy-mania. I think the dogs have gotten immune to the lure of a bouncing ball...only one took the bait. Afterwards we played two on two basketball, Momma and Mary Beth against Nick and Tadpole. We did not keep score, but all had fun.

I cannot believe it is February already, the month of Valentines, presidents days and Papa's birthday. It feels like we never truly had a winter. I saw DAISIES blooming yesterday! And then stressed, oh my, I have not planted any flowers yet! lol!

I have TONS of books I MUST read, I am thinking I need to shift my knitting time to reading time for a while. (Have not figured out how to knit and read at the same time.)....I carry a stack of books with me, as if having them in my possession will cause me to read them! All it causes is a sore shoulder, from hauling them around. But, man, I gotta know this stuff! LOL!

I so enjoyed the Esther bible study dvd this week. (Beth Moore's, session 3). It was about our Destiny, and that God called us for the place He has put us in, and for this time, and the impact of fulfilling the destiny He gave me, goes beyond me.

A lot of other great stuff in that lesson. I needed the reminders and refreshing.

I don't know if spring is in the air, probably too early for it, but the hope of spring is in the air.